Here Goes Everything or Here Comes Nothing - April, 2008
Have you ever stood poised on the precipice of uncertainty wishing you had something clever to say? Perchance, did the words Here goes nothing sit perched upon your lips?
Here goes nothing—the quintessential American colloquialism for describing the fragile border between the last chance to back out and the delightful ecstasy of uncertainty. The commonest thing to say before stepping across this void, to be sure.
But it dawned on me today I have no idea whatsoever this phrase is supposed to mean.
Here goes nothing? I simply don't get it. If I'm about to engage in an act with an uncertain outcome, certainly something has the potential to go somewhere—my aorta, my left tibia, my right femur, etc. There's a wager when we engage the uncertain; something is going somewhere.
And let us consider briefly the uncertain act going poorly. If the wager goes south enough, the end could be nothing—the great nothing. So rather than Here goes nothing, it would surely be more appropriate to say Here comes nothing.
So from now on, moments before engaging in an act of major uncertainty, I'm going to say, "Here goes everything." And if said act begins to take a turn for the worst, I shall attempt to say, "Here comes nothing."
It seems more appropriate to me this way.
~ topher